This is a page that everyone can use. The idea is that whenever anything positive happens in terms of coping with or healing from Borderline Personality Disorder we can write about it here (using the comments facility). It doesn't matter if it's a few words or a few paragraphs as long as it's positive - even the tiniest accomplishments matter! That way there will be a lasting record for us all here which we can read over when looking for inspiration.
This week I have noticed that I don't seem to be obsessing about my boyfriend any longer. This has been a major symptom of my BPD for twenty years because I have severe attachment issues. I believe this has happened because I have been focusing on things that I find fulfilling (writing, supporting others) and my self-esteem is increasing due to this. I also believe that because I am learning to accept myself as I truly am I can finally have a really healthy relationship without major anxiety.
ReplyDeleteI want to say thank you to Clare for providing this opportunity for me to share my experiences. Thanks Clare.
ReplyDeleteEach of us has a journey to travel and there is no right or wrong path to follow in my view. For me, it's about learning to cope with mental illness and functioning as best I can. What works for me may not work for you and vice versa. If you read this hopefully you can identify with some aspects and that may help you.
Honesty with myself has been vital. For many years I was in denial about my illness, I lied to myself as I did not want to believe I had a problem. I was living in the dark and it was me that had turned off the lights. I learned the biggest lie you ever tell are the lies you tell yourself. It took honesty for me to acknowledge there was something wrong.
After honestly evaluating my situation I have had to learn acceptance, of myself for the person I am. We often forget that we are all flawed and it is in accepting those flaws that we gain strength. That strength can then fuel our growth and aid us in our understanding.
For me honesty and acceptance are the door way to improvement. They provide the foundation on which I am building my life.
Thanks so much for sharing that John.
DeleteI very much identify with what you say, I have had to go through the exact same process myself. I don't think it's possible to over-emphasise how important self-acceptance is.
One of the most positive things I've conquered as I live with BPD has been the identity issues. Until recently, I've NEVER been comfortable with totally being MYSELF. I've always transformed into being what I thought someone else wanted or needed me to be. This no doubt originated from a complete lack of validation growing up. It's taken a lot of time and hard work, but I now self-validate...which has increased my self-love and self-worth exponentially. I am now able to love myself as I am---flaws and all. NOW, I present my perfectly imperfect self to the world, rather than hide behind the mask that has kept me safe and in control for much of my life.
ReplyDeletewww.womentalhealth.blogspot.com
Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom Markeeda. We seem to be having a theme developing here - authenticity as a key factor in healing from BPD.
Delete